Ashley’s Top 5 Lessons I Learned the Hard Way:

1. In no way entrust one person will all of your life long dark secrets, even if they promise not to tell and are your best friend and you’ve known them for years. It will come back to bite you in the ass later. Guaranteed.
2. Never assume that you will always have someone somewhere to count on or help you in times of need. Sometimes the only person you have to help you through something is yourself.
3. Never, never, never eat pink chicken no matter how many times someone tells you that it’s just the sauce or marinade.
4. The only person that you will ever have to please is yourself. Don’t bother trying to spend time pleasing anyone else – you’ll loose yourself in the process.
5. Always speak your mind to your loved ones, even if you know it will hurt them. Leave nothing unsaid. There will be a time when those unspoken words weigh down on you leaving you wishing you had said them.

Katie’s Top 5 Lessons I Learned the Hard Way:

1. You can’t trust anyone (sometimes not even family)
2. Promises are nothing more than false hopes
3. There are no good people
4. Aim before you shoot
5. Don’t get your hopes up because all that awaits is disappointment

Matt’s Top 5 Lessons I Learned the Hard Way:

1. Slow down. The one who finishes life first isn’t the winner.
2. If it won’t kill me, I’m not going to worry about it.
3. Everybody lies.
4. If you can count your friends on more than one hand, you’re shitting yourself.
5. Opinions are like assholes. Everybody has one and they all stink.

Mike’s Top 5 Lessons I Learned the Hard Way:

1. Always trust your “Spidey” Sense.
2. Never let a mentally ill person into your home…ever!
3. Deadlines mean nothing.
4. Computers did not make our lives easier.
5. Restraining orders mean nothing without witnesses.

J.T.’s Top 5 Lessons I Learned the Hard Way:

1. Don’t laugh when a woman asks you if you have ever thought about marrying them.
2. Don’t eat any food that they might serve to you if in fact you did laugh.
3. Even though it is sometimes referred to as the “Muscle Of Love”, Ben-Gay should never be used on it.
4. Never assume that your friend turned off the correct breaker before you start working on the electric.
5. Never refer to Hamvention attendees as “Hamsters”.

Sky’s Top 5 Lessons I Learned the Hard Way:

1. The US Border Patrol has no sense of humor.
2. When about to be involved in a motor vehicle accident, always endeavor to be the faster-moving of the two vehicles.
3. Cheap Tijuana tequila tastes even worse coming up than it does going down.
4. Broken bones never really quit hurting.
5. You gotta die of something.

Woody’s Top 5 Lessons I Learned the Hard Way:

1. All the warnings of ‘If you play with fire you’ll get burned’ are true. Literally.
2. That when a woman says she just wants to be friends, she means it and won’t change her mind no matter how good you are to her.
3. Spell check doesn’t always work.
4. Don’t go on a first date to an outdoor activity in the middle of the winter and then forget where you parked the car.
5. Don’t ride a roller coaster on a full stomach.

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